Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
