JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
This can only be settled by a dance off.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
