shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
