There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
