my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
