Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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