Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
