So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
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