oh god the rape fog is back!
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize