At least make sure they are 18
Why
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
