Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
