He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
