but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
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