you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
