White coat. Heels.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Randomize
