why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
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