people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
