i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Randomize
