he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize
