He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
