i think my tv is drunk
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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