I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
