I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
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