used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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