Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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