With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
he was CRYING into my vagina
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
