I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
