Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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