Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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