Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
