There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
