Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
