When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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