your thong is hanging out like whoa
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
