I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
