A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
