Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
We left an ass print on the piano.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
COCAINE IS GR8
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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