I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
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