Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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