Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Randomize
