yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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