day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
