i'm lost and i look like a hooker
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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