if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
