should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
