What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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