Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
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