why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
