dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
He had one of those small greek statue penises
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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