Need sex. Gaining weight.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
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